THE KITTENS CAME BACK
my brother told me that in the bathroom at monumentour someone yelled “fall out boy sucks” and another guy yelled “what the fuck did you just say” and they got in a real fist fight
me: *takes a shower*
me: *gets into clean pajamas*
It cracks me up when the actors on a show are also the producers because I always picture them casting themselves like
"Who’ll play the main character? Ah yes. Me."
Guys will never understand the joy of having your period a week before you travel.
Reasons why you should have plants in your room
- More clean air
- People think you are cool
- They look pretty
- You can sing to them and they won’t tell you to shut up
- You feel proud when they grow
- You can give them cute names
1. Your skin may never be perfect, and that’s okay.
2. Life is too short not to have the underwear, the coffee, and the haircut you want.
3. Everyone (including your family, your coworkers, and your best friend) will talk about you behind your back, and you’ll talk about them too. It doesn’t mean you don’t love each other.
4. It’s okay to spend money on things that make you happy.
5. Sometimes without fault or reason, relationships deteriorate. It will happen when you’re six, it will happen when you’re sixty. That’s life."
british people are sooooooooooooooo weird
Wot the fook did ye say? I’ll fook you up you cunting yank shit. Maths
”’I’m really not a cat person”’
but their feeT LOOK LIKE BEANS
THEIR. FEET. LOOK. LIKE. BEANS.